Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Sleeping with a Married Man


                                           


Recently, I was watching Dr.Phil. On the show, he had a group of mistresses, women having affairs with married men, saying why they did it. They all said the same things. In their minds, it's okay to sleep with a man who says, he's  separated, or is in a bad marriage. But here's the thing, it's not okay. After watching this show, I just had to add my two pennies. I know there will always be women with issues in this area. So I wrote this for you. All others can read and also add your two pennies. Here we go. 

For the women with an interest, or those sleeping with a married man, before you decide to do it or continue doing it, here are some reasons why you should not.
 
1. He's married. If this reason isn't the most obvious, look at his left hand, preferably the finger with the wedding band on it. He's walking around with a ring on it, and you find him irresistible? Resist! He's taken, off limits, and  not yours. Don't try to steal a man that doesn't belong to you. Find your own. There are lots of single men out there. Find yourself a good one.
 
2. He might cheat on you too. If he cheated on his wife to be with you, what makes you think he will not cheat on you? Many times when men cheat, they're only doing it for the thrill. So if you consider yourself a worthless pawn, to be played by a man seeking entertainment, by all means, knock yourself out. But if you know your value, walk away.
 
3. He does not deserve better. So he tells you that his wife is unattractive after having his children, he says she does not satisfy him, he says she treats him bad, and you believe it's your place to be the better woman that he deserves, right? Well you're not! What he needs to do is stop being a coward, and instead of cheating on his wife, tell her the truth and/or leave her. Rather than complain/lie to you only to get into your underwear. Don't be fooled, his wife isn't the only one being played, you are too. While he has fabricated his awful marriage, that is actually quite peachy, you're feeling sorry for him. Well don't! He just happens to be a happily married, dishonest, unfaithful prick. That's all. Is that the type of man, you see in your distant future? I would hope not. 
 
4. He's not friend material. Here's a classic scenario. You have a hard-working, married man. He appears to be so innocent. He makes it clear that he's only looking for friendship. He seems nice, clean, respectful, honest, and y'all have good conversations. You might flirt with him, and he flirts back, vice versa. Huge mistake! This is an affair seed being planted, whether by you or by him. 

Why are you even entertaining a married man that's flirting with you? Do you not find that a tad bit inappropriate? What kind of woman does he think you are?  It's not because you're hot and he couldn't resist, it's because he has no respect for the vows that he took, or the relationship that he's in. He definitely does not respect you, if he thinks that you're gullible enough to fall for his deception. 

Do you want a friend with benefits? News flash: A married man that sleeps next to his wife every night, while their children are in a nearby bedroom, is not the one.  He belongs to someone else. While you're pursuing him, he probably just slept with his wife the night before. Really? You're okay to sleep with a man that's still intimate with his wife? Because it doesn't matter what he tells you, if he lied to his wife, he will lie to you too.
 
5. It's all flattery. If he wanted to leave his wife, he would've done it a long time ago. And if he says he's staying for the kids, that makes it worse. He is cheating on their mother with another woman, to do what, make them happy? Do you see the point I'm trying to make? He's just flattering you, and you're falling for it. He just wants an affair, something to do, so that he isn't "bored."
 
6. You are pretty. If you feel better about yourself, because a man describes you as being more attractive than his wife, then clearly you have some internal issues. You don't need anyone's validation that you're beautiful. You don't need someone to compare you to anyone else, to feel pretty. While he's fluffing you up and you're feeling better, he's busy hurting another woman by cheating on her. And he's the perfect guy for you, right? Wrong.
 
Ask yourself, "What do I want in life?" I know you might be feeling lonely, and maybe a married man, is the only one that is showing you some interest. But you don't need to be the cause of someone else's unhappiness. Don't say it's the married man's fault because he approached you. You accepted him into your life, therefore you are also at fault. You do not need to be the mediator in a marriage/relationship. You don't deserve to be called a mistress, a side-chick, a home wrecker, because that's not who you are. At least I hope not. You are better than that.
 
Any man that is willing to cheat on another woman, just like you, doesn't deserve you. So when a married man seems interested in you, disappear! Reappear in an area filled with lots of single men, with no commitments. Save yourself from what will be a complete waste of time. Because in the end, it will only cause you more heartache and loneliness.

Did you find this information helpful? How has a married man approached you? How did you, or would you handle the situation? Let's have a heart to heart, in the comments below.
 
Peace and Love,
 
HeartMamaVI

4 comments:

  1. It's helpful, some men are just addicted to cheating..I knew a married guy he would hut women on single Web sites and in the club

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    1. That's terrible. But I agree, some men are addicted to cheating. They need rehabilitation. Thanks for stopping by.

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  2. Have u heard of that Website Ashley Madison

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    1. I didn't, but now I do. That is insane! A website that promotes having affairs? Just when I thought I've seen it all, this tops the cake. SMH

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